Recebi este mail recentemente da Tex, mas já o conhecia há alguns anos, quando rodou pela net. Tinha um amigo que sabia este texto de cor... "declamando-o" com aquele sotaque de italiano a falar inglês!! Era sempre uma risada pegada...leiam com atenção, e prestem atenção aos trocadilhos. Está fantástico!
Dear Signore Direttore
Now I am tella you the story how I was treated at your hottela.
I am comma from Palermo as tourist to London and stay at your hotella.
When I comma in my room I see is no shit in my bed. How can I sleep with no shit in my bed?!
So I calla down the recepcione and tella: "I wanna shit".
They tella me "Go to the toillett".
I say "No, no, I wanna shit in my bed".
They say "You betta not shit in your bed, you sonnawabitch". What is a sonnawabitch?!
I go down for ristorante for breakfast. I order bacon and eggs and two pisses of toast.
I getta only one piss of toast. I tella waitress and pointa of toast "I wanna piss".
She tella me: "Go to the toillett".
I say: "No, no,I wanna piss on my plate".
She then say to me "You bloody fella not piss on the plate. You sonnawabitch."
Second person who do not even know me and calla me sonnawabitch! What is a sonnawabitch?!
Later I go for dinner into ristorante. Spoon and knife is laid out but no fock.
I tella waitress "I wanna fock".
And she tella me "Sure, everybody wanna fock".
I tella her: "No, no, you don't understand me. I wanna fock on the table".
She then tella me: "So, you sonnawabitch, wanna fock on the table? Get your ass out of here".
So I go to the recepcione and ask for the billa. I no wanna stay in this hotella no more.
When I have pay the billa, the porter say to me "Thank you, and peace on you".
I say "Piss on you too, you sonnawabitch".
I go back to Italy! I never more comma stay at your hotella, you sonnawabitch!